There is nothing more frustrating than investing your time, heart, and energy in a relationship that's going nowhere.
This more than anything else can kill your spirit.
We know you want a safe, caring, and committed partnership. You want someone you can rely on and trust. Someone that you know will be there no matter what.
And we know you deserve to have that. That's why, more than anything, we want you to never waste your valuable time with the wrong person. We want you to spend your time with people who are worthy of it. People who appreciate you for who you are. People who recognize the gift that you are.
But we also understand how confusing it can all be. When you give your heart to someone and have your hopes and dreams wrapped up with them, you want so badly for it to work out that it doesn't all seem clear.
After the fact, when it all falls apart, you judge yourself and wonder, "How could I not see it?"
But of course you couldn't. You were in too deep.
We know all these feelings very well, we've been there. What we can share with you are a few simple ways to not get in "too deep" too fast.
So read on. Here are the 3 most common ways that most people find themselves in dead-end relationships and how not to get lost in them.
#1 You didn't say what you wanted at the beginning
So often we're afraid to simply ask for what we want.
Most people, in their hearts, want a relationship so badly but won't even admit it to themselves, let alone to anyone else. They think that wanting a relationship somehow makes them weak, needy, or pathetic.
We've reversed this thinking and we say that the only weak, needy, or pathetic thing about it is being too ashamed to be honest about what you really want.
Ask yourself, "Do I really have the courage to be honest about what I want?"
It's a tough question but a big one.
One of the most important things you can do in dating is to tell someone up-front that you want a relationship and ask them if they want the same.
Say, "I need to be honest with you. I'm looking for something serious and before we get too involved, I need to know if you want the same thing. It's ok if you don't, but I don't want to waste my time or yours."
That's something you can say on a first date or even a first phone call.
If you struggle to find a committed person, you have to consider whether you might struggle with commitment yourself. You may want a commitment, but do you want it enough to not accept anything less?
Most people won't be that direct because they're afraid of what that person will think of them, how they'll be perceived, or of being rejected. So instead of being honest about what you want, you attempt to play a game about it, hoping it all works out in the end.
But you already know...